Part of series of articles published in IMAX (monthly journal of IMA Rajkot) based on real life heart touching experiences-2014

An eight month old patient named Abdul Nawaz   was admitted for diarrhea in our Hospital before few years. Abdul was a cheerful, slightly malnourished child with long curls. We nick named him as Abdul Kalam in honor of our legendary president   Mr. APJ Abdul Kalam.  Abdul’s parents were migrants from Uttar Pradesh.  Mother, Rukhsar was a house wife and father was working in a brick making unit in outskirts of Rajkot.  Mother too was a lively lady with a sense of cleanliness and manners unlike her counterparts. She had one elder daughter about 3years.

As dehydration was corrected and frequency of diarrhea reduced, I talked of discharge the next day. But Rukhsar refused to go. She was not ready to get discharged until her son was perfectly well and requested me to treat the child without worrying of the charges. She said “I will pay all the charges.  What is the father working for? He will earn it anyhow, it’s his duty. She seemed a bit arrogant and that’s why I remembered her   for many months after discharge.

On follow up visits, I reminded her in a lighter note to complete the family now as she had two children one of which was already a son. She came up with an equally smart reply; “It’s not in my hand to follow your advice, it will be according to the wish of Allah.”

There was no whereabouts of Abdul or Rukhsar for many months. The family returned back after about 2 years. Rukhsar had the same look of arrogance now mixed with a bit of maturity that time would have put on her. But she seemed more graceful, confident and responsible. This time the patient was a girl of about 18 months named Rani. Abdul was now about 2 years, eight months old. I quickly calculated that Rukhsar   would have already been pregnant when Abdul was in hospital and that would have been the reason she gave the excuse of Allah.

Rukhsar promptly deciphered the puzzled expressions on my face. She said, “Madam, first examine my child then I will tell you the whole story”. After understanding the prescribed medication and follow up advice, she sat down to reveal her story.

This girl, Rani was not her biological daughter.   Rani was daughter of their next door Hindu neighbors, in the village in U.P. Her parents were murdered by family members   in a land dispute when she was just nine months old. It was a criminal case wherein Rani’s two uncles were in custody under trial of murder. All of a sudden Rani had become an orphan. Rukhsar’s in- laws living next door started taking care of her. Nobody from Rani’s paternal or maternal side approached them to offer help or to take her with them.  After all she was a girl!

Rukhsar’s mother in law became ill and expired in short time. Rukhsar was at the village house during her mother in law’s illness and death. She took care of Rani along with her own children. Rani too started enjoying the company of children. After all the rituals were over, it was time for the family to return back. “Where could Rani go? I cannot take the sin of making  her orphan once again. I took her along with my children. Now she is my second daughter and third child.” Rukhsar proudly declared the entry of third child in her family.

I consider Rani as Rukhsar’s   daughter of love, daughter of humanity; which knew no barriers of community or of gender. I praised Rukhsar for her ‘bold and beautiful’ decision but with a very obvious question, “Was your husband ready to accept the decision?”  To this she had a beautiful answer. She replied, “He has to!!  After all it’s me who care for children the whole day.  If I am ready what problem he could have? Otherwise also he is working to feed a family of four people. Now, he will have to work a little more and I will have to save a little more. Above all who are we to claim that we are bringing up our children?  Only and only Allah cares for them, and us.  All of us have a destiny we can never for see or predict.  It was Allah’s wish to hand over Rani to us and it is his job now to feed her. Why should we worry?”

I was stunned to hear this. I cannot find any words to salute the decision of this young half literate, poor lady. I was judgmental   in my impression about Rukhsar.  Whom I considered an arrogant woman was actually a God fearing but an empowered lady in a true sense. Her decision had brought pride and respect not only to her womanhood and her motherhood but to all the females in world. We have few such shining stars twinkling in the darkest nights of “Save the girl child” campaign. I felt her courage was  no less than that of  Rani Laxmibai.

Her words echoed in my mind for many days and nights forcing to think over many issues…..

1) Considering her background, her economic status and education, which  strength had empowered her to take the decision?

2) Is Rani unlucky to lose her parents in infancy or is she lucky to get a mother like Rukhsar?

3) Would any other woman of higher education or from well off family have made her mind to mother a child, that too a girl of other community?

4) Supposing if she would have wished to do so, would she have the courage to stand for it?

5) Which life is better? Ours, where we cannot enjoy today for worries of a better tomorrow? Or that of Rukhsar, where she is fully living today, leaving the worries of tomorrow to the Almighty?

Dr. Neema Sitapara

MD (Ped), PGDip. (Adolescent Pediatrics)